What is the worst emotional pain you ever felt as an adult?

After being discharged, I went home and my kids felt better. My oldest daughter told me that she wouldn’t know what to do if something happened to me. I started holding sips of water but still couldn’t even look at food. I didn’t eat anything for 23 days. After that I started having soup.

I recall one night that I was over at Mom’s house and he was in bed. He started calling Mom and saying that he didn’t want to be alone. She told him to shut up and go to sleep. She didn’t care and continued watching some dumb movie with my sister. I got up and laid down next to Dad. We talked. Dad always recognized me, which really pissed my Mom and sister off, because even though he lived with them he didn’t recognize them at times. He went to sleep shortly after our talk.

Mom called me immediately because she wanted me to drop everything in my life and go fly over there. Her excuse was that Dad needed me. This was a lie! She just felt lost without me because she is that manipulative and cunning of a person. I told her that I couldn’t, but that I would make plans to go in a few months. She wouldn’t take no for an answer. A few days later she called me with Dad on video and told me that my father was going to die.

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My Dad was already sick and we “my family” were expecting him to pass away soon.

I was still in contact with my mother at this time just because I didn’t want to lose all contact with Dad. However, I had recently moved from Florida to Minnesota.

Upon the news of Dad’s passing I started vomiting. I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t eat or drink anything at all. For 7 days, if I only took a sip of water, I’d vomit. I truly couldn’t believe that my mother could do something so evil and so wrong. In my eyes, she killed him. I understood that she caused a premature death just to hurt me; and hurt me, she did.

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I will always be grateful for having a kind-hearted father. He was more than a Dad to me. He was my best friend and someone who never judged me; no matter what I said or did. In his eyes, I could do no wrong. ♥️

When my father passed away. It was the worst emotional pain I ever felt in my life.

I was always very involved with Dad’s health and I’ve been upfront with him. About 8–9 years prior to my move Dad experienced kidney failure. I remember going to the doctor with him and explaining to him that if he wanted to prolong his life he needed to go on dialysis. He opted for dialysis and told me he wanted to live. His very 1st surgery ever was in his 80’s for a port in his arm for dialysis treatments.

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Later, my Dad developed dementia mostly due to the dialysis treatments. However, Dad was always very kind, unlike the crazy stories you hear about people with dementia. Even when he didn’t know who he was, he was kind to everyone.

I talked to Dad on FaceTime. He immediately recognized me and said, you are J… my oldest daughter. I smiled and said yes! He named each of my 5 children and talked about them. He told me he wanted to come live with me. I said, yes. Then he asked me who was that lady sitting next to him. It was my sister. This upset her and she hung up the call.

After a week of not eating or drinking and crying on and off, my heart started hurting horribly. My children began to worry about me and my oldest told me to go to the hospital. I did. Ironically, the doctors in the hospital thought that I may be having a heart attack. They did countless tests which all came back negative for a heart attack. I was very dehydrated and was placed on an IV. Then one of the doctors came to talk to me and I explained to him everything about my Dad’s passing. He told me, “You are not having a heart attack, you have a broken heart!” 💔 He got up and hugged me as I cried.

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This man started talking about a male presence in my life. He said, “There is a man, an older man who says mean things to you and pulls your hair.” Then he said, “Oh wait, he does this but it’s not in a malicious way. He loves you so much! He does it in a playful way.” My husband said, “Yes, that’s her father” Then without me saying a word, the psychic said, “Something terrible happened and you are very upset. It’s something involving his death. He wants you to know that he was ready to go and he was okay with it!” I know my father would want me to be happy and okay with it, even if he wasn’t. This man knows nothing about me. By the end of the reading, my husband who doesn’t believe in this sort of thing; believes that at the very least he was the real deal and not a scammer.

Then at home she was very cruel and disgusting towards him. Ironically, my sister also picked up such nasty behavior from Mom and added to the cruelty. Fuck, whatever you do stay away from sadistic female covert narcissists. I have never witnessed anything like this in my entire life!

I’m at peace with Dad’s passing now. This was the strongest emotional pain that I’ve ever experienced in my life, so far. Dad and I were very close and despite Mom always trying to make wedges in our relationship, she failed miserably.

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I called Mom and attempted to get her to bring Dad over. I even told her that she could come with him and that it would be fun. I found a dialysis center a few blocks from my house. Mom loves traveling so at least temporarily it would have been nice. I even convinced my sister, who is extremely enmeshed with Mom. I told her that the burden of caring for our elderly parents didn’t have to fall on her solely and that I would not work just to care for Dad and basically entertain mother. My sister thought it was wonderful; or at least she said so.

Shortly afterwards, I decided I would go no contact with my mother. I have zero interest in ever talking to her again. She is dead to me. Ironically, she did send me a message with my sister saying that she feels like I’ve buried her alive. I had a talk with my therapist about this and he said, “Of course she does, because she has no life without you in it!” I don’t know why but it somehow felt good and yes, she is dead to me.

Mom called me back afterwards and told me that Dad was too weak to travel because she and all of my siblings decided to stop the dialysis treatments and that he was dying. She did this on purpose and exclusively to hurt me. I told her, “You need to be a woman and stop hiding behind everyone else. You made the decision to end his life, but you are such a piece of sh*t that you must put my siblings in front of that decision. You are an excuse for a woman, a person, a human being!” She laughed! I’m sure that she could feel my pain through the phone and this was bliss to her. My father peacefully passed away 3 days later according to my brother; the one born 14 months after me. This is the only sibling I have that I fully trust.

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

About a year later, my husband and I were on a date. We were walking around the Stillwater shops when we saw a big purple sign for a psychic reading. My husband is agnostic due to the way he was raised which is a whole other story. However, he doesn’t believe in this sort of thing and has always said it’s nothing but a scam. I convinced him that we book an hour. He said, “I’ll go with you, but I’m not letting anyone read me anything!” I said, fine!” That hour was a life changer. I must say that my husband is right, and there are many scammers out there claiming to see, hear, and do things they can’t possibly do.

Mom enjoyed the attention she got from doctors and nurses by caring for Dad. Yes, she would perform the most ridiculous acts of kindness just to get praise. This really upset me because none of it was genuine and no one could see it but me. It would make me sick to my stomach just to endure such pity parties.

About a year after my move to Minnesota, Dad had a very bad reaction to one dialysis treatment. He was very weak and even though this is normal for any dialysis patient; it’s even more normal for a person in their 80’s.

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